Tianne Webster-Barrett
Ravenclaw Prefect
Sixth Year
i'm developing a language and i'm calling it my own.
Posts: 627
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Post by Tianne Webster-Barrett on Aug 3, 2008 0:54:25 GMT -5
Matty's words had really struck the girl. Tianne stood there, motionless, although her emotions were running crazy, knowing that she was probably making too big a deal out of this whole situation. She didn't want to fight with her best friend, but with the anger that the girl had built up over the last few minutes, she couldn't just let it go. That wouldn't be good for anyone, especially Tianne. She didn't want to seem jealous either, but the way that things were panning out, Matty may just get that impression from the older of the two. Tianne was actually incredibly immature, but really, she just wanted Matty to understand. It was the saying that more and more people said every day, mates before dates. It was selfish, but Tianne seemed to be getting quite possessive of the hufflepuff.
"Matty, I know Emeric. Emeric is in LOVE with you, and I don't think that anything you say is going to affect that. If Emeric's father is as biased as he sounds, and Emeric is going against that, then that means something. I don't know if you noticed this, but Seth was my first boyfriend, ever, and he ended up stabbing me in the back. Boy's screw around, there's nothing changing that, and there will be complications." Tianne spoke, truly saying what her heart told her to. Tears were now consistently gracing her cheeks, and a red col our had filled her face. "I should go." Tianne spoke quietly, walking out of the water, towards her things.
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Post by Matilda Wentworth on Aug 3, 2008 1:11:58 GMT -5
Matty felt that surge of guilt well up inside of her, which had only come after ti was too late to bite back on. Why, oh why had she dragged Seth into this? She felt like a horrid friend about this whole ordeal, but bringing the Slytherin into it... well, that just made things worse. But if thats what it took to get Tianne to see things from her eyes, then thats what it took. She didn't realize it now, but in any other case Seth would have been there to pick up the pieces of them both; this time, there was no one to do that, and they were fighting their own battles.
"Matty, I know Emeric. Emeric is in love with you, and I don't think that anything you say is going to affect that."
The words stuck on her, leaching themselves to her body. Matty was hardly able to concentrate on whatever other words the Ravenclaw was saying. her reaction to this was slower than it would have been usually, but she did have a reaction all the same. "Do you really know Emeric, Tianne? If you did, then you would honestly be able to understand just why we couldn't, and didn't tell anyone." she stated, feeling anger boiling up inside her like a disease. This was not good, not at all. Matilda Wentworth was one of those calm-headed, understanding girls... but at the moment, anger seemed to be a disease that was becoming an epidemic.
"I understand that Seth was your first boyfriend, and I know that he hurt you. But I also know that I've had my fair share of breaking boy's hearts, and I wasn't about to do ahead and jump into doing that again with Emeric. Don't you get it?" Matty watched as Tianne walked out of the water, heading to wards her things. No way was she letting this go that easily. The Hufflepuff rushed out of the water, her body becoming exposed to the dry air that was swirling around them like a thin shell of protection. She stood a meter behind the older girl, crossing her arms over her torso like a shield. "We both know what it's like to be hurt, Tianne." she said, almost bitterly.
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Tianne Webster-Barrett
Ravenclaw Prefect
Sixth Year
i'm developing a language and i'm calling it my own.
Posts: 627
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Post by Tianne Webster-Barrett on Aug 3, 2008 1:23:21 GMT -5
Tianne wasn't happy that her ex-boyfriend, the one that she now felt so bitter towards. She thought of it as sad, as the other girl had to bring him into things, knowing perfect well that that was like opening an old wound for Tianne. Matty just didn't understand; there was always boys for Matty. Tianne didn't have guys queuing up for her, there wasn't anyone that was interested in her. Seth had been the first and the only, and Tianne hadn't since had a guy even look at her the same way. Matty took that for granted, Tianne would give anything to just have that feeling back.
"You know, this had made me learn more about Emeric. Maybe he isn't the proud, arrogant guy that I thought he was at first. Guys queue up for you, and most seem to think its an achievement of its own just to kiss you. I did exist before we met, I could see with my own eyes. You're lucky to have people like you, Matty." Tianne spoke, spinning around on the spot to face the girl. "I've barely seen you this past month, and I don't know, I thought we were best friends." She said, before turning around again and continuing to walk over to her things. "You know, I think you do more damage then you receive."
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Post by Matilda Wentworth on Aug 3, 2008 1:43:06 GMT -5
If someone had shown Matty a tape of this argument say, oh, a day before, she would have slapped them in the face for making up such a cruel joke. But this was defiantly not a joke, and for all it was worth, this kind of fight was enough to leave their friendship teetering on a thin line. What Tianne was saying seemed to cut Matilda like a knife, though she refused to let that show. Before this day, the teenager hadn't been conscious of any jealousy that may have come between them. Or at least, thats what it seemed to be, coming from Tianne. She hadn't ever considered the fact that she had been with more guys than her friend, before, or even after Seth.
What the Ravenclaw said... well, it could have been true, but the Hufflepuff didn't think she could accept that. "I think you do more damage then you receive." Yes, that hurt. Probably more so than any comment she had been on the end of. And did she really know as much as she claimed about Emeric? The girl felt the words wrestling deep in her stomach, something that had been stuffed down there long ago. They seemed to expand and rise, through her heart, and up into her throat, where they launched themselves out of her mouth. "Do you think that I go running around begging for attention, Tianne? Do you think it's that simple? We can't all be the smart, innocent girl that people like, even though they're shy. Even if people like me, at least you don't have the guilt on your shoulders, knowing that you have caused people to hurt." she said, her eyes blazing deep with fury, her eyes now stinging with tears.
"And I don't see why you have the impression that there are boys lining up to be with me. Yes, I do have allot of guy friends, but in no way is it my fault that you can't get over keeping to yourself. At least you don't have to worry about being bitched about for your previous choice in boyfriends, Tianne."
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Tianne Webster-Barrett
Ravenclaw Prefect
Sixth Year
i'm developing a language and i'm calling it my own.
Posts: 627
|
Post by Tianne Webster-Barrett on Aug 3, 2008 2:08:13 GMT -5
Tianne didn't want to show her emotions, she didn't want Matty to see that this whole fight was ripping shreds through Tianne's mind and sense of decency. She was so angry at Matty, it had evolved past the whole boyfriend situation. Tianne knew that friendships were built on trust, and iwthout that key ingrediant, it wouldn't work, it could not. She understood that Matty wanted to, but Tianne knew that had she had been in the same situation, Matty would have been the first one to be told the news, perhaps even before the boy that she had most probably shared the moment with. She was angry at Matty, but at herself as well.
For all she knew, this could have been the end of the best friendship that Matty and Tianne happily shared. This was big, and this wasn't just going to go away. Both the Ravenclaw and the Hufflepuff needed to calm down, though they were both too proud and arrogant to admit that, not only to each other, but to themselves.
"You don't get it, do you? You feel so sorry for yourself, but god forbid you fall off that high pedastal you're always on, looking down on other inferior beings, 'cause then, you know what's going to happen? You'll have to walk around down here with the rest of us. Not everyone can be as 'cool' as you, or as 'popular', but that isn't what this is about Matty. This is about the trust that friendships are meant to be based on. But of course, the trust between you and your latest boy is so much more important, isn't it Matty?" Tianne said, once again turning towards the girl, but taking a step closer as she spoke. It was quite cold now, the clouds had covered the sky, almost as if they could sense the tension in the air between the two girls. It looked like it was going to rain, but Tee didn't care. Her blood was at boiling point, and that would only calm her down.
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Post by Matilda Wentworth on Aug 3, 2008 2:49:57 GMT -5
Matty found it hard to recall the last time that they had fought... at all. But she did take the few seconds, to try and figure out when they had fought last, and and it had been about. And how ironic; it had been in the first month back at school, and about Emeric Troy, at that. What was it about this boy that seemed to make their blood boil in synchronization? Last time it had been Matty choosing to sit with Emeric rather than her usual friends, because he hadn't had anyone else to sit with. Tianne had gotten upset about this... but now... had she been jealous? Was the teenager seriously putting the boy before her best friend? No, she wasn't. As much as she loved Em, Tianne was her best friend, her sister, at that. Well, she was, the way things were heading. But it seemed that this was bigger than a mere fight that was based on jealousy about one person. Oh, no, it was much more than that.
Matilda let herself stand there, her hands sitting limply on her hips, water still trickling down her back from her hair. She allowed herself to withstand what Tianne was saying, bearing the feeling of what felt like continuously blows to her stomach and her self pride. "Maybe I don't get it, then. Perhaps you should explain it to me, then, Tianne? Why is it always about me being on my, what did you call it? Right, my 'high pedestal' because I'm so 'cool' and 'popular'. How can you blame me for being who I am? I'm not about to turn around and change my personality, just because you're getting angry about me making other friends and not just sticking around and moping about Seth and Ryan leaving." Matty stared Tianne square in the eye.
"I never said it was more important!" she exclaimed, anger and desperate need spilling out of her voice. "Just because I didn't tell you didn't mean I wanted to keep it from you. I did this to protect me, not to block you out. But can you accept that? Is this really about me breaking your trust," she paused, taking a breath to steady her voice. "Or is it about the fact that you think I'm replacing you?"
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Tianne Webster-Barrett
Ravenclaw Prefect
Sixth Year
i'm developing a language and i'm calling it my own.
Posts: 627
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Post by Tianne Webster-Barrett on Aug 3, 2008 3:04:28 GMT -5
The last time the two had fought had been trivial, and stupid, in anyones opinion. It was a silly matter, that Tianne would more than happily forget and never have to think about; EVER. Tianne hadn't really had a relationship where she hadn't fought with someone, as beyond Matty, Seth and Ryan, Tianne's only other relationship had been with her family. It was a sad life to live, yes, but Tianne didn't need friends, she had... Well, Tianne had books. That's what kept her going. She hated arguing and everything, but sometimes the girl just needed to to blow off some unwanted steam. This, however unfortunate it was, was not one of those times, she was truly angry at the girl.
Tianne knew that she was being horrible, but she needed to, to get her point across; or so she thought. Tianne didn't want to be fighting, and saying mean and bad things about each other, but she had gotten so caught up in the moment that she had gotten carried away with the whole situation. She wasn't ragging on the girl's personality, as in Tianne's opinion, that was the best part about the girl, and she wasn't dissing the girls boy habits, she wasn't meaning to at all. Would this damage that Tianne has already set be stuck, irreversible, set in cement? She hoped not, but not even a psychic could predict that now.
"I'm not moping around. In case you didn't notice, you are my only friend now, and you kept on disappearing for the day, and I had no idea where you were. I didn't have anyone to hang out with, but I tried to make friends. I'm not as outgoing as you, people aren't drawn to my alertness, Matty. I have to make friends, but I can't. I'm nothing like you." Tianne spoke, tears still streaming down her face. "Do I think that, Matty? Or is that what is going through your mind, because that hasn't even crossed mine."
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Post by Matilda Wentworth on Aug 3, 2008 3:21:20 GMT -5
Alike the other girl, Matty had intentionally set out here to bring up matters that should have remained untouched. If she was looking down on this situation from outside, the girl would have been pinching, kicking, hitting, cursing at herself, in order to stop her from slicing her best friend into pieces. But not only that... she was cutting herself up inside, too, bringing up all this talk of popularity, friends, boyfriends and personalities. It had taken a long time for the teenager to be comfortable with herself. It had taken her a good while to be happy with herself. It had taken her years to get over the fact that she was going to be different from others, and whether that was directed in a way which meant regarding her mother and her family, or her friends and such, she wasn't really thinking about.
Which was why she would be so surprised and... disgusted in herself, if she was looking back on this. Matty was being just as horrible as Tianne. She had walked into this situation with a clear mind; wanting to come clean, and get onto the road to recuperation. But now, she had a feeling in the pit of her body, which stated otherwise. Her mind was foggy with angry and frustration, swirling with points and further argument that she was trying to push aside, but slowly failing.
"Sorry for having a life." she muttered, her words surging with regret. "Just because I have a boyfriend doesn't mean I'm going to ditch you. And just because theres going to be complications with boys doesn't mean you should expect me to run back to you when things get tough. I know what it's like." the comment was actually directed more to wards herself than Tianne, and Matty had a feeling, or rather a hoping that her friend would be able to recognize that by the sudden softness of her voice. "I didn't say that, but it seemed that it's what you were implying." the girl's green eyes sprung with tears, and she noticed the other girl now crying. Merlin, she hated herself for that.
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Tianne Webster-Barrett
Ravenclaw Prefect
Sixth Year
i'm developing a language and i'm calling it my own.
Posts: 627
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Post by Tianne Webster-Barrett on Aug 3, 2008 4:32:24 GMT -5
Tianne had no idea how Matty was currently feeling. and what her opinion on the situation was, but to be completely honest, she didn't really cre. Her best friend had hurt her, and that was something that was now irreversible, set in stone. THey could forgive each other, but the feelings of regret and resent would always be there, even if they did become friends again. She didn't want to seem narky about the whole situation, as usually things become a little more biased when you're angry at the person, but Tianne hated both herself and Matty at the present time, or more so what anger had turned them into.
Tianne knew that they weren't like this normal, this was just something that happened through the pressure that was put on the two. The girl hadn't meant to start what was now the girls' biggest argument, ever, and she'd just have to try and find a way out of this. It wouldn't be easy, but as stated before, anything in life worth having is worth fighting for. "I understand that with other commitments, it is hard to keep up with everyone and everything. It really sounds like you're implying that I want things between you and whatever boy, i don't know, to stuff up, and 'get tough'.
Tianne too hated herself for this, but it wasn't over yet. She was crying, as was her companion, although they both were proving that they weren't good company, and there wasn't anything that the girl could do to stop that now.
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Post by Matilda Wentworth on Aug 3, 2008 4:51:19 GMT -5
Matty's chest rose and fell steadily, though she felt far from stable. Tianne had been her best friend, heck, she still would be, granted the girls settled down. But the Hufflepuff wasn't sure how much further this was going to stretch, or how far either of them could take the pressure. Yeah, she was aware that allot of this anger was probably a build up of other issues in their lives, like OWLs, the evident friends issues they were both going through, as well as trust and such. She didn't want to fight and make more of a mess than she already had, but now the damage was done. The teenager knew that this was by far the biggest, and worst argument she had ever gone through. She also knew that if they couldn't fix it... then Matty had lost the best friend she had ever had.
"It really sounds like you're implying that I want things between you and whatever boy, I don't know, to stuff up, and get tough."
She could clearly see that Tianne was crying by this stage, but Matilda merely wiped back her own tears. Her voice was solid, hard and cold when she did reply. "Emeric is not whatever boy, and he never will be." she stated firmly. It was one thing to insult her, but it was something entirely different to insult her boyfriend. Merlin, was that girl glad she had decided not to tell Tianne with Emeric around too, or else this would have been quite the awkward moment. "I don't see why you would think I would want you to come between us, for the sake of making things tough. What is this exactly about, Tianne? Is it because Seth is gone, and neither of us can bring him back? Is it because I lied to you to protect my own feelings, and to keep a promise to someone I care about? Is it because you think I'm going to chose him over you? What?"
And as if on cue, a shower of rain began to fall. It had been a great afternoon, blue sky, warm weather, but it seemed as though the temperature had dropped with the girl's moods. The rain wasn't heavy, only a rather light sheet, but it made tiny droplets of water land and slide down Matty's bare skin. She could almost imagine the water creating steam from her burning body.
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Tianne Webster-Barrett
Ravenclaw Prefect
Sixth Year
i'm developing a language and i'm calling it my own.
Posts: 627
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Post by Tianne Webster-Barrett on Aug 4, 2008 0:16:48 GMT -5
Tianne didn't know what to do, nor to say. She had said everything that she felt needed saying, even though in reality, she had said so much more than that. In fact, nothing at all needed to be said, it was a trivial and petty fight that the girls' had somehow concocted. At last, as the silence fell, only for the mere second, Tianne felt calm, and oddly stupid. She now could see what she had caused, the silly, idiotic fight that she had made, with a person who was just trying to do the right thing by herself, her friend and her boyfriend. What had Tianne done?
As Matty's next attack hit the girl like a ton of bricks on a caterpillar, Tianne's feeling of regret was swept away, and she was angry again. She couldn't find any reason not to be anymore, and she believed once again that this was for the better. She didn't want to see the truth in the argument, she didn't want to know what trouble she had made, and the strong fact that it was irreversible.
"Why do you insist on bringing that backstabbing, cowardly, stupid, idiotic boy into this? You and I both know that I want nothing to do with him, and this certainly isn't about him." She spoke clearly and blatantly. "I didn't say that Emeric was whatever boy. I'm saying, that no matter who it is, you think that I want it to stuff up, so that I'll get my 'friend' back? It's about any of that crap. Its about the lack of any trust, that you don't trust me, at all. How would you like to find out that the person that gets you through everything, and is always there, in thick or thin, didn't find you worthy of your respect?"
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Post by Matilda Wentworth on Aug 4, 2008 0:32:42 GMT -5
In the seconds that they were both still, Matty could feel the thick air between them, separating the two girls like a barrier. She knew that almost every attack they had thrown had made some sort of impact, some sort o scare on each other, which would no doubt stay within them. Now that the teenager had time to reflect, she could feel the sickening feeling of regret washing over herself, like the rain was doing. She was still extremely angry, yes, but now it was running at her hand in hand with regret. She hadn't wanted to hurt Tianne at all, but merely get her point across. Though for the last few minutes, all she had done was send wave after wave of insults and faults towards her friend. Guilt was also making an appearance.
Matilda felt like her stomach was wrenching with worms of feeling, which was eating her from the inside out. She wanted to scream. She wanted to cry. She wanted to run into the lake, and never look back at the mess she was making. She wanted to fled to the castle and find Emeric, her refuge. She wanted to collapse on the ground and appologise to Tianne. She wanted to reach out and touch her, but she couldn't, in fear that the heat from his argument would surely burn her fingertips. The girl let what her opposition said sink in, as she struggled to find the words to muster an answer in defense.
"I think that he has a very big hand in this, actually. I think that deep down, you know he isn't a backstabbing, cowardly, stupid, idiotic boy, but you're using this as an excuse to let out all the pain he caused you." Matty paused again, staring down Tianne. "For gods sake, Tianne. Would you stop putting the words into my mouth?! I never that I though you wanted to become between me and any boy. I never said that I don't trust you at all. You know that I trust you more than anyone else here, and I though I could trust you with this information, and I thought I could trust you to understand! You know how much trust I've put in you, and telling you about Emeric wasn't exactly a walk in the park, was it?" the girl finally let her eyes drop to the ground, feeling tears water her gaze.
"What do you want me to do?"
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Tianne Webster-Barrett
Ravenclaw Prefect
Sixth Year
i'm developing a language and i'm calling it my own.
Posts: 627
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Post by Tianne Webster-Barrett on Aug 4, 2008 0:45:51 GMT -5
For one watching the situation, it would look quite funny. Two girls, battling it out, wearing nothing but their swimming costumes, arguing about who knows what, and to top it all off, it was puring rain. ?The grounds were empty, except for the occasional owl flying past and the field mice scurrying across the fields. But the look of the girls' couldn't be more different to how it was actually like, the writer could be absolutley positive that Matty and Tianne shared absolutely none of those feelings with the observant, in fact, they were basically the opposite of that. Tianne was fuming, and could only guess that Matty was feeling the same thing too.
"Matty, Seth may not fit that description for you, but to me, thats all he is now."
Tianne spoke, from her heart, with a soft voice. Tears came streaming down her face, as she lost something that she couldn't replace. She missed Seth with all her heart, but she knew that this wasn't about that. This was about the two girls and no one else. "I've pictured this in my mind, I knew that there had to be something going on, I just didn't know what. I never thought I'd take it this way, but I never thought that my best friend would hide something from me for four months." She said, knowing that it wasn't true. If only her pride wasn't so large, she'd apologise. "Matty. I don't know."
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Post by Matilda Wentworth on Aug 4, 2008 1:01:05 GMT -5
Matty knew that what Tianne was saying was utterly from her heart, she could practically see the raw emotion in her words, on her face. Again, she felt guilty for having to bring Seth into this, but if it got her friend to see reason, then the girl knew that not all was lost. The Hufflepuff even caught herself sighing slightly. It was coming down to the fact that Seth hadn't told Tianne, yet he had told Matty about leaving. It was about the fact that Seth had left her best friend, knowing full well that nothing would be able to replace the hole he left in both their lives. She knew that the fond memories of Seth had turned black in Tianne's eyes, and it despite all, it was still upsetting to witness them getting to this stage.
"Well by now, I don't expect you to understand why I had to lie to you. But I'm telling you, I did it to protect myself and Emeric, and I'm willing to wear that badge of selfishness. But if someone you loved asked you not to tell anyone, and you knew you needed to do it for yourself too, would you have gone against your loyalty to that person?" she didn't expect and answer, but then again, she did hope for one. Matilda kept her eyes glued to the ground. "Well neither do I, Tianne. I'm sick of trying to convince you that this was something I had to do, not something I did to hurt you."
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Tianne Webster-Barrett
Ravenclaw Prefect
Sixth Year
i'm developing a language and i'm calling it my own.
Posts: 627
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Post by Tianne Webster-Barrett on Aug 4, 2008 2:06:17 GMT -5
Tianne had been hoping that Matty recognized the passion that had come with the girl's last comment. She felt strongly about that, and knew that it was important enough to her that Matty was sure to know it. Tianne was acting fairly immature about the situation that had become apparent after the revealing of a relationship between Matty and Emeric, one that Tianne had not been sure of. It was quite depressing, to see two best friends out in the rain, arguing their cold butts off, disagreeing with almost everything their opponent said. Tianne was sure sick of it by now, and she knew that Matty would be too; if the girls were currently being nice to each other, they would have told, but of course, without an argument, the situation would no be here.
"I understand that you did it for yourself, but you've got to take risks to keep things alive. You didn't have to tell me that you were dating, but you could have said you had a crush, or something. You didn't have to tell the whole truth, but white it. Matty, you know that I wouldn't tell anyone, I mean, who would I tell, but you didn't recognise that. You didn't do it to hurt me intentionally, but it did. And nothing will change that now." Tianne said, looking up at the girl, although she didn't have any eye-contact. Muttering under her breath, Tianne looked down at the spot that her friend was looking at. I give up... She whispered.
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