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Post by hermione7lunaroc on Mar 1, 2006 22:42:29 GMT -5
"I think it was the anti-Drew thing I had going," Lily said quietly. "But with Drew, who knows? Not me. He told me I never really knew him. I make too many bad decisions in my life." She fiddled with a loose thread she found on her shirt.
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Allegra Thornton
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Post by Allegra Thornton on Mar 1, 2006 23:07:41 GMT -5
"You tell him you're anti-Drew and you don't understand why he said his feelings don't matter to you?" Allegra asked, trying her best not to sound accusatory. "You don't understand why he says he's just not going to care anymore?"
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Post by hermione7lunaroc on Mar 2, 2006 7:38:51 GMT -5
Lily was quiet. "I'm stupid alright," she answered. "And I have awful people skills. I really don't even deserve to be here. Things would be better for me and everyone if I just went back to Germany. Drew and I couldn't fight anymore in Germany. I wouldn't have to worry about things with Nic in Germany. The only thing going back to Germany wouldn't fix is never having anyone to depend on. But that's never going to happen so I may as well resolve myself to it not happening."
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Allegra Thornton
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^it's just me^
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Post by Allegra Thornton on Mar 5, 2006 21:17:38 GMT -5
"Why is an all or nothing deal with you?" Allegra asked, frowning a bit at the girl. "If things go bad, suddenly everything is bad and you talk about running away. What is THAT going to fix?"
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Post by hermione7lunaroc on Mar 5, 2006 21:30:35 GMT -5
"It's not all or nothing deal," Lily said quietly. "And it's not something I've been suddenly thinking about. I've given it a lot of thought. I don't really have any friends left here. There's Ari and Nic and that's about it, since Drew's not into forgiveness apparently."
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Allegra Thornton
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Post by Allegra Thornton on Mar 5, 2006 21:38:05 GMT -5
"Drew is mad at you and now you want to go back to Germany," Allegra said, trying her best to stay patient. "He wasn't mad at you last time you left. What was your excuse then? If I remember correctly, an awful lot of people put themselves out on a limb to try and get you back. What do you think will happen if you try to leave now? Is this going to be some sort of test to see how much people care about you? Because if that's what it is, it sucks. If things are bad you stick it out and deal with them until they get better. Leaving is a cop out."
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Post by hermione7lunaroc on Mar 5, 2006 21:46:51 GMT -5
"Not a test," Lily said. "Why not go back to my dad? My heart's already been broken so much, it's doubtful he could break it anymore. I'm not even sure if it's Drew I'm really upset with or if it's myself." She admitted quietly. She was quiet for a bit. "And he was mad. Really mad."
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Allegra Thornton
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Post by Allegra Thornton on Mar 5, 2006 22:23:54 GMT -5
"I'm sure he was," Allegra answered, not sure if she should let Lily in on her brother's inner workings. Allegra had been dealing with him for 15 years. She knew him pretty well.
"You made him feel like a putz," she finally said. "He cared about you and you disregarded his feelings. It's highly doubtful he's not going to make that mistake again."
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Post by hermione7lunaroc on Mar 5, 2006 22:32:18 GMT -5
"I think I disregard everyone's feelings Allegra," she said quietly. "Even my own. I don't know how to act around everyone. I don't know what it's like to have people care. I don't know what it's like to be normal. He doesn't have to be my friend again, I just don't want to go on feeling like he hates me."
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Allegra Thornton
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^it's just me^
Posts: 2,420
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Post by Allegra Thornton on Mar 5, 2006 22:42:49 GMT -5
"Did you try and talk to him about it?" Allegra asked, knowing Drew could get pretty angry, but he would never stay angry for very long. "Because I highly doubt he hates you."
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Post by hermione7lunaroc on Mar 5, 2006 22:47:03 GMT -5
"I was talking to him," Lily said. "That's when I apologized. It's kind of necessary you talk to the person in order to apologize. " She almost laughed at Allegra. "I don't. If I was him, I'd hate myself. I'm me and I hate myself for crying out loud."
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Allegra Thornton
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^it's just me^
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Post by Allegra Thornton on Mar 13, 2006 22:03:39 GMT -5
Okay Lily..." Allegra answered, resisting the urge to roll her eyes at the girl. Still, she didn't appreciate the sarcasm when she was just trying to help. She and Lily had started out just like this. Why did she think this time would be any different?
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Post by hermione7lunaroc on Mar 13, 2006 22:14:52 GMT -5
"Sometimes you're just like your brother," Lily said quietly. "I thought I could trust you. I thought maybe you could help. You're older, you're supposed to know more stuff about life. But I guess I thought wrong."
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Allegra Thornton
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Post by Allegra Thornton on Mar 13, 2006 22:40:09 GMT -5
Allegra fell silent, not sure what Lily wanted from her. their first conversation, Lily had blown her off as some spoiled rich girl who knew nothing of the real world. Nwo she was supposed to know more?
It was a while before she spoke again. "I'm trying to help Lily, but you don't seem to want it very much. When someone asks me for advice, I usually expect them to not blow me off."
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Post by hermione7lunaroc on Mar 14, 2006 7:23:38 GMT -5
"I'm sorry," Lily said quietly. "I'm not tryiing too. Really I'm not. I'm just. I dunno. I'm confused and messed up and screwed up and every day that goes by only seems to bring some other way that I screw up my life."
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